Strangers in a strange land: International students share their journey from isolation to building a home away from home

For many international students, the journey to study abroad is filled with excitement and promise. But it can also be a profoundly isolating experience, as students find themselves far from family, friends, and everything familiar. In this article, we hear from several international students who bravely share their stories of struggle and triumph as they learned to build a new life and sense of belonging in a foreign land.

The shock of arrival

“My name is Jill, a 24-year-old PhD student from Nigeria studying at a university in the United States. When I first arrived on campus, the isolation hit me like a wave. For weeks, I barely spoke to anyone besides a couple other international students. The cultural differences felt overwhelming – back home we’re so communal, but here everyone seemed so independent. I spent most of my time alone in my dorm room, desperately homesick and wondering if I had made a huge mistake.”

Jill’s experience is common among newly arrived international students. The initial “honeymoon” period of excitement quickly gives way to culture shock as the realities of life in a new country set in. Students often struggle with:

Language barriers, unfamiliar social norms, loneliness, academic challenges, and practical issues. For many, this leads to intense feelings of isolation, anxiety, and depression in those first weeks and months.

Hitting rock bottom

“I’m Mohammad Reza from Iran, studying engineering. About two months into my program, I hit my lowest point. I was struggling to keep up with my coursework because I couldn’t always understand the lectures. My classmates rarely included me in discussions. I felt so stupid and worthless. One night I broke down crying in my apartment, wondering how I could possibly make it through four years of this.”

Mohammad Reza’s story highlights how academic challenges often compound the social and emotional difficulties international students face. Many report:

Trouble following rapid English in lectures, hesitancy to participate in class discussions, and feeling academically inferior. These issues can severely impact students’ self-esteem and mental health if left unaddressed.

Small steps toward connection

“My name is Dinara and I’m from Turkmenistan. For months, I was too shy and anxious to try making friends. But one day I forced myself to attend an event at the international student center. I met another girl from Central Asia and we bonded over missing our favorite foods from home. It was such a small thing, but it gave me hope that I could find my place here.”

Like Dinara, many international students find that taking small steps to connect with others is key to overcoming isolation. Successful strategies often include:

Attending events specifically for international students, joining cultural or interest-based student clubs, and volunteering in the local community. While it can feel daunting at first, most students find the effort to reach out pays off in new friendships and a growing sense of belonging.

Finding strength in identity

“I’m Asliddin from Tajikistan. At first I tried so hard to fit in and act ‘American.’ But I realized that was just making me more isolated and unhappy. So I started being more open about my culture – wearing traditional clothes sometimes, cooking Tajik food for my roommates. To my surprise, people were really interested and it led to great conversations. I learned I didn’t have to give up my identity to belong here.”

Asliddin’s realization is an important one. Many international students initially try to assimilate by downplaying their cultural background. Embracing and sharing their unique identity often leads to deeper, more authentic connections.

Building a support system

“Hello, I’m Shyloh from South Korea. The turning point for me was realizing I couldn’t do this alone. I started regularly visiting the international student office and attending their workshops. I found a mentor through the university’s program. And I finally worked up the courage to see a counselor to deal with my anxiety. Having that network of support made all the difference.”

Like Shyloh, successful international students often create a diverse support system to help them thrive. Key resources may include:

International student services offices, academic advisors, mental health counseling services, and student organizations. Importantly, many students report that seeking help actually increased their sense of belonging by connecting them to caring individuals across campus.

A new home away from home

“This is Tsilli, originally from Israel. Looking back on my four years here, I’m amazed at how far I’ve come. Yes, there were incredibly difficult times, especially at first. But I’ve made lifelong friends from all over the world. I’ve grown so much as a person. This place that once felt so foreign now feels like a second home. And I know the skills I’ve gained in adapting and connecting across cultures will serve me well wherever life takes me next.”

Tsilli’s reflection echoes what many international students discover – that the challenging journey of studying abroad ultimately leads to profound personal growth. While the path is rarely easy, most find that perseverance pays off in:

Increased self-confidence, strong cross-cultural communication skills, and a global network of diverse friendships.

Advice for new international students

Drawing from their own experiences, our student contributors offer this advice to incoming international students:

Be patient with yourself, don’t isolate yourself, seek help when needed, and remember you’re not alone. Embrace new experiences while celebrating your unique background and perspective.

Creating a welcoming campus for all

While individual effort is important, universities also play a crucial role in supporting international student success. Best practices include:

Comprehensive orientation programs, ongoing cultural adjustment support, and mentorship systems. By working together, universities and students can create truly global campuses where all students feel at home.

The journey from isolation to belonging is rarely easy for international students. But as the stories here show, with persistence, support, and openness to new experiences, it’s possible to not just survive but thrive in a new cultural context. These students’ courage in sharing their struggles and triumphs lights the way for others following in their footsteps as strangers in a strange land.